tWiSt N tUrN

I am Lazy blogger.. It can be guessed by the Gap i have took between my last blog and now...
A lot had happen in between.. some can be shared and some been buried deeeep inside the heart...
Afghanistan, I have neva understand this country since the time i have arrived here . At times it gives me hope and strenght but at the same time it makes disappointed and week.. out come confusion confusion confusion ................., One of my hope and desire was to return back here and work for the better future.. .. but the state of confussionness has over shadowed my Dreams and desires ...

Sometimes i think is it worth of being here??.. since a normal Life span of human may be 60 years or 65 Years and i have already crossesd 26 years of it which means almost half of it.... does it really matters what i feel or desire for this country .. i can have the best of fun in India .. or then this Brain arises one more question that may be every afghan has this desire in their heart to be an active member in rebuilding afghanistan and bringing back its old glory but there has to be some one who spark that Josh or that fire... again within a moment may be faster then a blink .. this brain comes up with brand new question .. where are the men of this nation who had an apprehensiveness or idealogy like the The Martyr The Great Masoud our National Hero , First President of Republic of Afghansitan. Martyr President Daud Khan and Martyr President Dr. Najibullah .. None of them are alive .. everytime a compassionate son of this soil has emerge is been killed.
Alot is there to be said on the issue but due the limited free time in office .. i am concluding this topic as a bleek past, uncertain present and confusing Future....

415 Days have arleady passed

31 jan' 09, 04.00Am - My phone started Ringing, It was Hudayb telling me that he is waiting downstairs as usual but... still unsual ...hmmm ever one was around me at home, dad, mum with her wet eye,Grandma, sarah's tremmbling voice, Zaid's PJs showing that he is coolingness as nothing so serious is around but between his brusting into tear and that plastic smile was my one word, Murid and Majid .. Massih and elyas my two cousin trying to help me by taking my luggage.. each second of that moment was so precious i neva thought.. life is taking me away from my attachement..





Hudayb's call again -- 'abhay sale chal na hai ki nahi' . I looked at Daddy's face " Ma Raftam Khai, Mara bukhshen " I hug Mum and felt her rolling tears on face.. Moment can be discribe as the most emotional moment of life .. In that hug when i close my eyes, i saw a short glimpse of my past stages of my life a child, a spoiled teen, and now a 25 year old adult.. how i have been brought up, sacrifice she did and the hardships she faced. I felt like a kid who barely can walk around and being taken away from his mother.... What a gift God has given to Mankind " Parents".





I left home and i saw my friend Syed Hudayb Mahmood with his Dhano waiting for me .. i sat at the front seat beside hudayb. Masih and elyas where sitting at rear seat of the car, i lite my cigerate.



We were just remembering the College days fun, when i ask the hudayb did he contact Neha. He said yes but she neva responded .. I was a bit disappointed by her immature behaviour, since I always considered her as one of my best friend to whom i shared every things.., And she will always hold the same place.



I dont have friends but i have best friends .. I would love to confess that My friends are the best assets of my love.

We reached near Radisson Hotel, We witness a huge Sky of fog since the area is open and near IGI Airport . the speedpmeter of the car went down from 60km/h to 10Km/h. It was like an adventurous trip. At 5.15 Am, we reached at the airport, get my passport and ticket ready to enter the terminal. So i did bye bye formality with my beloved cousins and my friend, and aproached towards the terminal Entry. Security at the entry Asked me " Document please" , after seeing it he said ' Kabul Jayega' and i said "YES". I met everyone who were important to me but only Neha, which was pinching me every moment.

415 days has gone since my first trip to Afghanistan.

MeMoRiEs ArE tO cHeRrIsH